genuineness. {yes, that's a word.}

i've been having a lot of conversations with people lately where the topic of genuineness has come up. {i looked up the word 'genuineness' in the dictionary. somehow it doesn't seem like a real word, but apparently it is?}

what does it mean to be genuine? when i looked it up on dictionary.com this definition came up:

genuine {adjective} : free from pretense, affectation, or hypocrisy; sincere

so let's break this down a bit more. pretense is a false show of something, affectation is an effort to appear to have a quality not really or fully possessed, and hypocrisy is a pretense of having some desirable or publicly approved attitude and sincerity is freedom from deceit, hypocrisy, or duplicity.

THEREFORE...genuineness is free from false shows. genuineness is free from efforts to pretend to be someone you aren't. genuineness is being one person all the time. genuineness doesn't put on a mask. genuineness is about being kind rather than just being nice.

i want so badly to be genuine. i want to be one of those people where what you see is what you get but i just don't know how. {note: when i say that, i don't mean one of those arrogant people that says 'love me for who i am or get away.' i mean one of those people that is just straight up without any two facedness.}

cons:
genuine people are vulnerable. genuine people can be taken advantage of because people know they care. genuine people are selfless, caring more about others needs and wants than their own.

because of these things, it's intimidating to try to be genuine. i'm afraid that if i was genuine, i would become almost neglected. i'm afraid that my needs and wants wouldn't be met. in all honesty, i feel like i have to whine a little in order for people to actually care about how i'm doing. i'm afraid of my idea of genuineness...someone who gives and gives and gives and never receives.

pros:
genuine people are free spirited. genuine people are trustworthy. genuine people are kind. genuine people are loved. genuine people are real.

i desire to be genuine. when i look at that list of pros and cons, i see the cons as inconsequential and shallow. i want to be REAL. i want to have an impact, and in my opinion, people who are genuine have more of an impact on those around them than people who aren't genuine. and overall, i feel like i am called to be a genuine person. so i'm working with my Papa to figure out what that looks like and how i can live it out in a practical way.

thank you for once again "listening" to my ramblings!

{DISCLAIMER : this isn't an enlightened post about genuineness. this post is simply my ideas of who and what a genuine person is.} (: